Paris 2024 – The Olympics are here again, well just. Opening Ceremony fails to deliver?

London 2012 was so much better?

The Olympics are back and for the next couple of weeks we will be inundated with the achievements of the world’s greatest sportsmen, and women. Or do I now have to say sports people?

But the show to get us all in the mood was ‘different.’

The idea of the Olympic ceremony being in the heart of Paris – rather than a stadium – had a sort of appeal that pandered to my ideal for something different.

I am not an avid watcher of the opening ceremonies. They are on the whole pretty drab affairs. London 2012 excluded. Perhaps London just hit my sense of patriotic pride, or was it just the best there has been? I know, like many others, we have a jaundiced view, but it was good. Wasn’t it?

So, with my glass of cool Sauvignon Blanc in one hand, I settled down to be entertained. I thought it was only right; To give the French a chance plus a new take on events intrigued me.

But it didn’t take me long before my desire to see what X was saying was aroused.

Hardly 10 minutes in and the comparisons with London 2012 were being vented, and not favourably. I was a little more reserved. I would give it a chance to grow. When all said and done, this was no sprint, but a marathon. One of 4 hours!

However, whether it was the rain or the vastness of the city that drained the life out of the show, I’m not sure, but despite its best efforts, it fell well short of my expectations.

It went on and on. Like the speeches. Why use a few simple words when you can go on and on, and on, and on?

The masked rider and the robotic horse sweeping up the river started out as a wonderful symbolic message that seemed to get lost as it also dragged on until we were left with what appeared to be a knackered horse.

And did they raise the flag upside down? Many implied they did.

This was followed by another long and boring boat ride up the River Seine, by some tennis players – on the point of sea sickness – holding the torch, which finally moored in what was now a deserted Louvre and surrounding district.

I assume we were supposed to be impressed with the light show from the Eiffel Tower, which initially we were, but come on, why use lasers when good old fireworks are far more impressive?

I half expected to see the Guillotine in action, no doubt for the head of director of the show being up for the chop, but unfortunately, I guess I missed that bit.

Finally, lots of old people in white jogged along to the ‘Balloon’ for the flame lighting.

What happened to Citius – Altius-  Fortuis?  Faster – Higher – Stronger. I guess that doesn’t count now. We are now all-inclusive, so the old, frail, and the handicapped – sorry can I say that – are all there ready to pass on the flaming torch. Harsh, I know, but this is supposed to be about the ultimate sporting athletes, isn’t it?

Finally, it was over. Four hours of my life I won’t see again. Was it worth it? Quite clearly not.

Those that had come to that conclusion so early in the ceremony were right. It wasn’t a patch on London 2012. Apparently the French didn’t go for a rehearsal…not surprisingly, it showed as much.

But I gave it a go. I did watch it all. I can say honestly that it has put me off completely from watching another opening ceremony. I should have stuck to my instinct.

The idea was good…but the execution – pardon the pun – was a bit of a damp squib.

I guess you can’t beat a bit of rain to ruin what could have been a lovely evening in Gay Paree. Oh, that and a pretty poor Olympic Opening Ceremony.

Claire Balding, commenting on the BBC, summed it up. “Truly original”…Oh, the irony. That and her putting Michael Johnson on the spot asking him for his take on things, as he struggle to keep a straight face he said, “That was different”… Oh so true.

Ah well, let’s hope the games are better…they have to be, don’t they?